I have a dear friend and client who is experiencing a bit of a struggle with seeing through unexpected complications regarding her new business. At times she is over the moon ecstatic and the next moment sullen as a grey sky. Both moods seem appropriate for someone starting something brand new with limited experience and finances.
When she gets in the low moments, I want to shout “keep going. Don’t stop, you are almost there.” Usually I don’t because I recognize that it is a a scary process for her to do alone and second, her confidence will soar when she is able to wake up the next day and realize she didn’t stop. That’s why I teach that patience and perseverance should always be stated at the same time.
People often ask for or remark that they need patience but what is really needed is perseverance. What is the difference you ask? Here’s my definition – patience is the skill you use to quiet your mind while you demonstrate perseverance towards goal attainment. Patience keeps you dreaming while perseverance keeps you doing.
You cannot accomplish anything without both. When we plan our projects and our goals, we always have an outcome and a target date. But how many people plan for eventual stumbling blocks? The kind that make it difficult to move forward or tell your mind to quit. Examples include:
1. The friend or loved one who tells you “your project is just a hobby, cause you aren’t making any money yet.”
2. You meet your target date and launch the product or business only to realize there was something you needed to do but didn’t know about.
3. Each night you stay up, working your business plan and creating products to show potential investors, no one wants to invest.
4. Finally, you did it. You wrote the book, created the cover and you have copies printed for you and the family. They didn’t like it.
5. You have a great business idea and the enthusiasm to get started. Your partner has expertise that you need, but they won’t help you.
Each one of these scenarios can be difficult to adapt to on their own but what happens when you are facing two or more? Do you give up and say I knew this wouldn’t work out? Or do you give yourself a short time out to regroup and then begin again? The decision is completely up to you; however, it is my hope that you take no more than a weekend to mentally recover and then you dive back in.
I know! I know! The question percolating in your head is “how do I get started again when it seems that the universe is conspiring against me?” (Actual words of a friend going through the this issue.). You just do. That’s what perseverance is about, doing despite the reasons why you should stop.
You start! You start! You start!
1. Start thinking of alternatives to the problem you are facing.
2. Start thinking of ready responses to people who don’t support you.
3. Start telling yourself that you can handle anything thrown at you.
4. Start telling yourself it is OK to have anxiety but that it is not OK to quit.
5. Start working on solutions.
6. Start working on your next project.
7. Start demonstrating what you can do instead of talking about what you are gonna do.
When you want to give up – You keep going!
Til next time,
Start giving yourself permission to succeed because the power to success has always been within you