How To Win Friends and Influence People – Chapter 7

“An easy way to become a good conversationalist”

Here we go again. A great tag line that leads your mind to wander as to what the secret is.  Is it one of those great African Proverbs?  Maybe a snippet from the biblical Proverb? Or maybe it’s an ancient Chinese secret as The Karate Kid movie says?  Maybe it’s just basic common sense written from a creative perspective that helps us to have a desire to follow along.

Well the notable answer was a combination of all.  The basic premise is, do what you want others to do – Listen.  Listen and not interrupt.  However the scenarios profiled help to make this basic skill entertaining.  In college I was taught the skill of active listening as a means of ensuring that we understand information being conveyed.  This chapter is conveying the same information but has packaged it in a manner that details the benefits to the listener as well as the talker.

Here are a few of the quotes and questions to consider regarding Chapter 7.

Notable Quotable:

1. “Exclusive attention to the person who is speaking to you is very important. Nothing else is so flattering as that.” – Charles W. Eliot

2.  “They have been so much concerned with what they are going to say next that they do not keep their ears open. … Very important people have told me that they prefer good listeners to good talkers, but the ability to listen seems rarer than almost any other good trait.” – Isaac F. Marcosson

3.  “So if you aspire to be a good conversationalist, be an attentive listener. To be interesting, be interested.” – Dale Carnegie

Questions For Reflection:

1.  What did former Harvard President Charles W. Eliot say is the secret of a successful business interview?

2.  How did Edward Bok become a successful magazine editor with only 6 years of schooling?

3.  What did the author ask you to remember when you are talking to someone?

Strategies For Success: 

Listen.  Look into their eyes and remove all distractions. Listen. 

Til next time,

“The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.” – Mohandas Gandhi